The Anti-Diplomat's Handbook: A Masterclass

1. Never prepare – Winging it shows confidence
2. Make up facts – By the time someone checks them, you can have added more. They'll never catch up.
3. Use phrases like "people are saying" – they can't be challenged
4. Invent scares – drugs, immigration, crime
5. Make it personal – Nicknames for world leaders build rapport
6. Never have a bad meeting – Every encounter was "tremendous," "the best," regardless of what happened
7. Insult allies publicly – They'll respect the honesty. Everyone was bullied at school.
8. Abandon agreements – People's memories are short; you'll discover from personal experience
9. Praise autocrats – People respect strong leaders: Hitler, Stalin, Putin, Kim Jong-un
10. Threaten via press conference – They'll talk about the insults, not the content
11. Make everything transactional – It's just a game of Monopoly. Everything, everyone can be bought, sold or thrown under a bus
12. Forget briefings – Get a cap that says "I'm right about everything"
13. Have your own private army
14. If a bad story looks like it's breaking – start a war
15. Scare the shit out of everyone